If you had to fight for your place in my life the way I have to fight for mine in yours, would you?
Sure, it doesn’t seem like much of a fight, but it’s a silent battle nevertheless. One I fight within myself every day, trying to make peace with the feeling that I don’t quite belong here. That there is no place for me in your life, at least not one that was ever meant to be mine. That you were never meant to be in my life, and I was never meant to belong to you. Yet somehow, against all odds, here we are. And somehow, something that was never supposed to happen has become something I can no longer imagine my life without.
So what do we do now? What do we do with all these feelings that have nowhere to go? What do we do when loving you means having to make peace with a reality that hurts me? What do we do when I’m the one who gets hurt? When the little happiness I get from having you in my life is no longer enough to make up for the pain of knowing I can never really have you?
What do we do when I can no longer bear it? When I can’t bring myself to stay, but the thought of leaving you feels just as unbearable? What do we do when I love you too much to walk away, but staying means slowly breaking my own heart?
And if it ever came down to it, if loving me meant having to fight the way I silently fight for you, would you?
Or would you simply let me go?
