She Was Sea

I woke up today and started seeing all the decade rewind posts on Twitter and thought to myself, what has my decade been like? So I started with the list which made me look back on my life like I have never before;

2009: the worst
2010: 💔
2011: gave up on school & moved to Male’
2012: was a literal mess
2013: got an internship & landed the first Resort job at Front Office #GreatBeginnings
2014: I can’t even remember what this year was about – might’ve been actually happy
2015: 💔 by someone who wasn’t worth it
2016: thought I’d met the love of my life
2017: Jumped into Sales & Marketing #BestCareerMove 💪🏽
2018: exhausted & mentally drained
2019: 💔 got out of something I never thought I’d have the balls to get out of 🙏🏽

I’ve worked in resorts continuously since 2013; although the distance got tough I love what I do and couldn’t be happier.

“𝘐 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘐 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘥𝘦𝘤𝘢𝘥𝘦 𝘣𝘺 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘱𝘭𝘦𝘵𝘦𝘭𝘺 𝘴𝘩𝘶𝘵𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘰𝘧𝘧 𝘧𝘰𝘭𝘭𝘰𝘸𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘶𝘮𝘢 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘐’𝘮 𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘪𝘵 𝘣𝘺 𝘣𝘦𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘪𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘨𝘰𝘰𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 & 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘮𝘺 𝘭𝘪𝘧𝘦 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘐 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘯𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘣𝘦𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦. 𝘐𝘵’𝘴 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘣𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘥 𝘪𝘯 ‘𝟶𝟿.”

It was only towards the end of the post that I realized everything about the past decade was me stepping away from everything that went down in 2009. 2009 was indeed the absolute worst. I’ve forgotten most of it, how it felt, how most of it felt, but there are things I still remember and things I wish I could forget. And if I’ve learned anything at all that is, some wounds don’t heal unless you treat them. I thought I could run away from it, but halfway through my marathon, I realized if I didn’t want to feel the things I’ve been running away from I’d always be running. I can never stop. But by then it was too late. Running away was the only thing I knew. So that is what I did.

Maybe someday when I have the words I’ll write about my 2009. I think I have an unfinished attempt Here for now.