Doing the right thing can sometimes make you feel so lonely.

Not going after the people you love, not fighting for love, and ultimately letting them go. Because they weren’t meant for you.

Can reality pause for a moment? I don’t think I’m ready. I don’t think I’m ready to face that I have to go back to a place where we are strangers again. The same airport you dropped me off at now I set foot in knowing we’ll never speak again. And what kills me is not knowing why. 

When I go through my old photos, I see myself with the smile you gave me and eyes that sparked my love for you. What a time that was. It seems like just yesterday that I was always glued to my phone, reveling in our never-ending conversations about life, work, and love.

You treated me right and that’s what got me in the end. And after all this time, I’m still gotten. You loved me more in difficult circumstances than anyone else did in great ones. You didn’t have to, you didn’t choose to, yet you did. We fell deeply, what a happy chance of serendipity. I hope I never forget that. Not that I’m holding on, but how could I not dwell in my once in a lifetime kind of love?. I’ll never forget you, get over you, and I’ll always wonder what we could’ve been if things had turned out differently. We’ll always remain a wonder. One without an ending but prolonged longing.

I admit it’s painful to think and know we’ve really parted, after many many tearful goodbyes. And that no matter how much it mattered at the moment, one day it won’t. I can’t blame you for moving on, just because I struggle to and when all I’ve done is push you away.

I try to go on, looking for love elsewhere, desperately hoping that something would make as much sense again. But it hasn’t, and it most likely won’t. All I’ve done is try, over and over. Returning to this familiar yet doomed ending, again and again.

I’m happy for you, happy that you’re happier in your life, the life I couldn’t be a part of. But loving you, is something my heart cannot stop. This bittersweet love is the worst sort. The right kind of love but at such a wrong time.

Love you, I always will. Miss you, I always will. But I’m strong enough to see that we can never be more than what we were, and what we were will never be again.

I hope you never stop smiling, and that you never lose your charm. I pray you never miss me as much as I miss you, because I know how much it pains me, and with loves like this, I can only wish better things for you.

Stay happy, my love. You have my heart, still.

Imagine cutting things off with someone because you knew deep down that no matter how much you cared for them, they were doomed anyhow, so you left believing things will eventually make sense without them. But then you’re here, years later, still unable make any sense of anything.

It’s heartbreaking to see them walk away while you’re struck by their absence. It’s heartbreaking, but nothing lasts forever, not love, not what you believed was love, and not even their presence. Everything, including your feelings, life, and people, is transient. You can’t help but stand by and watch it all come to an end.

Sweaters are hugs for bad days.

I don’t know what hurts more, that I’m here yet again after all this time, or the fact that you still don’t care, after all this time.

Jhe only person who has the power to make me feel this way.

I can no longer blame you for not seeing the love you once had for me in your eyes when all I’ve ever done is push you away. Wish I hadn’t, but that would’ve been selfish and wrong. I’m glad we ended no matter how painful it is to remember loving and losing you.

Even though it was a little late, I had to do the right thing.

We had sinned, loved, and prayed.
I yearned for love, yearned for each other, and yearned for mercy.

You were a gift of a love that was never meant to be mine. Simply intended to enjoy it while it lasted, then spend the rest of our lives repaying debts for memories we’ll never forget.

Oh how excruciating, finding love in someone else’s man.

Little did you know, each step you took away from me meant you were walking on shattered shards of my heart.

And behind you left, a girl with a broken heart. Tears streaming down her cheeks as she mourned a love that was never hers, yet somehow, her grief felt eternal.