As a woman, I’ve struggled with my identity after it was smeared so badly that I couldn’t even love myself anymore. Despite my efforts to love myself and encourage others to do the same, they only let me down. It’s hard to keep loving yourself when others don’t support it, and life can be lonely when you’re meant to walk it with others.

One thing that’s helped me explore my personality traits and find meaning in my life is astrology. I don’t worship it, but I believe that constellations can reveal traits and qualities you didn’t even know you had. However, there’s one thing that’s messed me up: my rapist shares the same birthday as me.

Ever since, birthdays have been more than just a celebration. They’re a reminder of everything I’ve been through, and a day where I’m grateful to be alive despite the times I’ve considered giving up. Turning 30 was supposed to be a big deal, but it was underwhelming and disappointing. I don’t expect much from the world, but I thought birthdays were an exception. They aren’t.

It’s easy to feel like no one cares about you as much as you do, but that doesn’t mean you should stop loving and taking care of yourself. You are worthy of love and support, even if others don’t always see it. And if they don’t see it, they aren’t the ones right.